I've been checking in off and on all day. I really hate to start off a thread this way, but here it is.
Late June/early July I was diagnosed with breast cancer. Invasive Ductal Carcinoma, Grade 1, Stage 2. This time next week I'll be in the hospital having a bilateral mastectomy. I'm not having reconstruction as I have no physical or psychological need for it. Strangely enough, I'm honestly not afraid. I was afraid between the testing and the diagnosis, but once I got that it was, "Okay, here it is." And I've had to backtrack a bit because I always insisted to my primary care doctor, "If I ever get cancer I'm just going to die, because I'm not going through all that stuff." But now that I'm facing the reality I remembered a Haitian saying, "A dog is just a dog until he's looking at you. Then he's Mr. Dog." So dealing with the real Mr. Cancer is a bit different from dealing with a hypothetical cancer.
Anyway, even for 70 I'm extremely healthy but for moderately high blood pressure. And I have a very strong sense of who I am and what I'm capable of, so I'm not terribly worried. I don't want you to worry either. Just wanted you to know why I haven't been around much and will be absent for a while longer. I still have a lot of people who need me and a lot of quilts and toys yet to make. Plus I always swore I'd live to 120 and I'm still sticking to that.
Good luck, Susan! Sounds like they caught it early enough there is nothing really to be afraid of. And I applaud your decision not to have reconstruction.
{{{ {{ { Susan } }} }}} So, you have joined the esteemed club of which Ally is a member. You are in excellent company. It sure seems to me that you have your act together and are making wise decisions. My dearest friend in all the world, Kim, had a bilateral mastectomy in October of 2012. Her father died of breast cancer and she's BRCA positive. She also opted not to have reconstruction and is very glad for that decision now. Hot Tip: Keep a notebook of all your appointments and what the doctors said when. She did and was so glad for it because each doctor does their little part and might not be seeing the whole picture at once. Even with a nurse navigator there were times when the left hand needed to be told what the right hand was doing. If at any point you'd like to talk with someone who has been through it (and is a wonderfully sane, wise woman) let me know and I'll put you in touch. And, hey, will you be needing hats? What style is your style? There's a super shop here that specialises and sells everything from scarfs to turbans to caps to wigs. You name it. I'd love to send you a hat in honour of the ones you made for Ally! ♥
Yes, I have the notebook going, keeping records of appointments, test results, etc. I'm hoping not to need chemo. It all depends on whether or not they find cancer in the sentinel lymph node. If I have to have chemo I will, but I don't have to like it! Thanks for the hat offer, but you know me, hat central right here.
Yes, hat central indeed! :-) Well, holler if you think of something you need that you don't have time to hunt for. I'm still using my personal fan! In fact, Eldest*Grand fell asleep two nights this week thanks to that fan! :-)
Sure am hoping your sentinel lymph node is clear. If not, you definitely don't have to like it. I think there can be a lot of positive energy of the raw determination sort in not liking it! Go Susan!! ♥
Howard is still first with me.
ReplyDeleteI've been checking in off and on all day. I really hate to start off a thread this way, but here it is.
Late June/early July I was diagnosed with breast cancer. Invasive Ductal Carcinoma, Grade 1, Stage 2. This time next week I'll be in the hospital having a bilateral mastectomy. I'm not having reconstruction as I have no physical or psychological need for it. Strangely enough, I'm honestly not afraid. I was afraid between the testing and the diagnosis, but once I got that it was, "Okay, here it is." And I've had to backtrack a bit because I always insisted to my primary care doctor, "If I ever get cancer I'm just going to die, because I'm not going through all that stuff." But now that I'm facing the reality I remembered a Haitian saying, "A dog is just a dog until he's looking at you. Then he's Mr. Dog." So dealing with the real Mr. Cancer is a bit different from dealing with a hypothetical cancer.
Anyway, even for 70 I'm extremely healthy but for moderately high blood pressure. And I have a very strong sense of who I am and what I'm capable of, so I'm not terribly worried. I don't want you to worry either. Just wanted you to know why I haven't been around much and will be absent for a while longer. I still have a lot of people who need me and a lot of quilts and toys yet to make. Plus I always swore I'd live to 120 and I'm still sticking to that.
Good luck, Susan! Sounds like they caught it early enough there is nothing really to be afraid of. And I applaud your decision not to have reconstruction.
Delete120? Hmmm. I'll settle for that.
Susan, tears. Then cheers. Then prayers. And light. And love. And all good things. ♥
ReplyDelete{{{ {{ { Susan } }} }}}
ReplyDeleteSo, you have joined the esteemed club of which Ally is a member. You are in excellent company. It sure seems to me that you have your act together and are making wise decisions.
My dearest friend in all the world, Kim, had a bilateral mastectomy in October of 2012. Her father died of breast cancer and she's BRCA positive. She also opted not to have reconstruction and is very glad for that decision now.
Hot Tip: Keep a notebook of all your appointments and what the doctors said when. She did and was so glad for it because each doctor does their little part and might not be seeing the whole picture at once. Even with a nurse navigator there were times when the left hand needed to be told what the right hand was doing. If at any point you'd like to talk with someone who has been through it (and is a wonderfully sane, wise woman) let me know and I'll put you in touch.
And, hey, will you be needing hats? What style is your style? There's a super shop here that specialises and sells everything from scarfs to turbans to caps to wigs. You name it. I'd love to send you a hat in honour of the ones you made for Ally! ♥
Yes, I have the notebook going, keeping records of appointments, test results, etc. I'm hoping not to need chemo. It all depends on whether or not they find cancer in the sentinel lymph node. If I have to have chemo I will, but I don't have to like it! Thanks for the hat offer, but you know me, hat central right here.
DeleteYes, hat central indeed! :-) Well, holler if you think of something you need that you don't have time to hunt for. I'm still using my personal fan! In fact, Eldest*Grand fell asleep two nights this week thanks to that fan! :-)
DeleteSure am hoping your sentinel lymph node is clear. If not, you definitely don't have to like it. I think there can be a lot of positive energy of the raw determination sort in not liking it! Go Susan!! ♥
Susan, your courage and determination awe me. With a spirit like that, there is no doubt you'll make it. You have my prayers and deepest admiration. ♥
ReplyDelete